Saturday, July 18, 2009

The Lure of the Road

I've written before about how roads can take my breath away. This is an unusually beautiful road, in exceptional light. It's one of my favorites, and I've walked it in every mood of sun and shadow, and even in inky darkness. I've tried to photograph it many times, and this shot comes closest to what it means to me.

The desire to linger in this perfect spot, and savor this amazing view. Standing in shadows and looking forward into the brightness to come. The crunch of the gravel underfoot contrasted with the silence of the open space before me. The urge to follow the curves, restless to see more before the light disappears.

Life feels like this, a lot, lately. I feel like everything is larger, stronger, and better lit than ever before. I want to hold all of this, keep it all, and I want to rush on to the next things. I'm hungry for it all, my eyes and heart consume everything before me.

And I'm also old enough to be able to stop, grin, and sit on the side of the road for a while, enjoying those who pass by, knowing that I can get back up any time and walk some more. I no longer feel so rushed. Eager, pulled forward by the desire to see what's next, but not pushed from behind.

I would never go back to my twenties, nor even to my thirties. I have never felt younger or more free, in some ways, than I do now. Everything feels like the open road - this open road, familiar and yet always new.

7 comments:

Odd Chick said...

This blew me away and yet, stuck in the middle of my heart. It said so much of what I feel myself in my core but could not express. Your words were like completing a piece of music with the perfect melody in my heart. That is a wonderful gift. Can I have permission to write this story in my journal so that I can enjoy it a hundred times over?

Utah Savage said...

I agree with Odd Chick. This is both a very lovely image and beautiful writing. I've missed you.

I have a sick friend I'm profoundly preoccupied with, so I'm not making the rounds like I used to. But I have been writing a lot of poetry. It is only in poetry that I can express this particular pain.

susan said...

There's something of old Europe in the look of the road, a track that leads to magic, mystery and unnameable splendor. I think you've captured its essence beautifully both in the photograph and words. Perhaps the moment you're referring to is now - a very slippery spot to ponder.

linda said...

this is a beautiful place, almost magical, like something happened there once of profound meaning, or maybe it was yesterday....steve, I am thrilled you are so happy doing what it is you do and that you are reaping the rewards....I have also missed you and hope your path does not take you far from us for too long a time..

thanks for that little bit of magic..

Steve Emery said...

What a lovely collection of comments, from a lovely foursome of ladies. Odd Chick, of course you can copy this wherever you would like. Utah, I am sorry your friend is sick - but glad you are writing poetry through the experience (or writing the experience through poetry). Susan - Yes, there is something of old Europe in this road - Moses Cone built well, and the land has embraced the roads over the intervening century. Linda - I hope I'm able to be back into this a little... Not as I was before, but more than lately...

DebD said...

I love roads too - especially unpaved ones. This picture is especially beautiful. Thanks for your thoughts too. It helps me to remember to savor those simple moments.

Karen A said...

I always remember you saying that when your physical age caught up with your internal age (30s), you felt like a person in a boat, approaching the dock, only to have the boat slip past the dock before you could moor. Careful -- this might be the same way!